It's all related

We've got family coming to visit for a week tomorrow, so don't mind me as I try to get my ass in gear and clean up this place. Did I mention they are staying for an entire WEEK? Did I mention that I don't necessarily have ANYTHING to talk about with 75% of the crowd? That I'm not really looking forward to this?

I'm struggling with the whole idea that family is the most important. I understand it for me, Hunk and our kids, but beyond that I don't understand why blood relation is a requirement to bend over backwards and spend time with someone whom you would not ordinarily ever hang out with. I get it for my parents, really - while we don't have a lot in common I can appreciate all that they have done for me over my lifetime. I can understand how they probably feel about me because I can translate that from how I feel about my kids. And while we don't have the same interests they are both pretty cool. I just don't get why we usually feel obligated to spend so much time with cousins, siblings, etc. with whom we really don't have anything in common with. If we weren't related I would NEVER go on vacation with them, and I certainly wouldn't let them invade my house.

Don't think I'm a jerk - I love my family, many of them.....but what about all the asshats in there? Why do they get a pass just because we played together when we were younger? I just don't place the value of blood relation as the foundation for "family" and why I have to cater to them. I guess I'm just too nice to say no. I mean, 'I' don't want to be THE asshat in the family...

Who has a vacuum and wants to come over?

You're going where?

People questioned me about flying across the country to have a drink with a few people. Specifically, Canadian customs agents questioned me. I left for Vancouver on a relatively uneventful Thursday morning, I planned my flight so that I could drop my kids at school and have time to get to the airport. Bonus for me was that there was NO traffic and I was way ahead of schedule, no line at security, I got a great seat with in flight entertainment. The perfect day of travel! UNTIL......I got to Canada.

I got off of the plane and instead of going straight to baggage claim, I hit the washroom and proceeded to freshen up my hair, face & breath - knowing that Hunk was waiting for me at the exit and we hadn't seen each other for quite some time, I was banking on getting some tongue. This all resulted in me being the last person to claim my bag in a virtually empty baggage claim area. I was the last person to approach the customs checkout and for whatever reason, I was diverted the opposite direction from all other passengers. I followed directions to a large waiting area full of officers and quite a few male passengers just sitting around, awaiting questioning. So, I sat. When it was finally my turn, I was pulled to a more private area where an officer proceeded to ask me why I was coming to Canada. My mistake, I said I was getting together with friends I met on the internet. **SOUND THE ALARMS** I was drilled on what a blog is, what's my blog, who are the other bloggers, how many are meeting, where are we meeting, what will we eat? drink? do? What do I have to show that supports this claim? Uhhhhm. I had nothing, well, I had a stack of TequilaCon hats in my bag that I did not claim on the customs form - I chose not to bring that up for the sake of creating more of a problem. I thought of my iPhone, while I had no service in this area I did have a few "Dave" related widgets. So, I showed him. He was not convinced just because I had a link button, so I showed him ASK DAVE....***MORE ALARMS***. I tried to explain that I was meeting this super fun dude who creates cartoons & apps, and I'm really just a housewife that needed to get away. Use this app, just ask it if I'm a threat to Canada, clicking on Geeky Dave "do I have any dangerous items with me?" - to which he replied "The data indicates Y-E-S". "Am I in anyway here for malicious reason?".... "Aye Captain!" says Pirate Dave. This is not going well - let's switch to Nirvana Dave who is notoriously positive. "Am I a nice person, just on vacation?"......"This is doubtful". Greaaat. I spent a solid half hour in behind the scenes customs, turned the government onto Blogography and finally managed to convince them that I had no ill intentions with my flat irons and chapstick.

Hunk met me on the other side, not surprisingly a bit worried by my delay in exiting the plane. He was all snazzed out in his suit and he met me with flowers....and you might've thought we hadn't seen each other in a month by the way we were groping in the airport.

It's hard to explain to the people in my world why I would go to Vancouver to meet some internet people. Nobody gets it, they never will. Fortunately for me I wasn't just going across the country for TC2010, Hunk was there for work and the absence was definately taxing. We knew that he was going to be travelling across Canada for quite a few days leading up to TC2010 so this was a great chance for us to plan a "getaway".

While Hunk did have to work on Friday, it gave me a day to explore Vancouver on my own and decide on the best spots for us to make the most of "our" time together on Saturday and Sunday. Plus, I'm a rather independent type of girl and I absolutely LOVE to be by myself and be free to just check stuff out without holding anyone back or dragging someone to a place they aren't really interested in.

Saturday, we had some issues understanding exactly where public transportation would take us (we didn't buy a transit map!) and we ended up getting dropped on the opposite side of the Lions Gate Bridge. We thought we would just walk back across the bridge to get to Stanley Park, which was really fun, but OMG, it was raining and that is a long assed bridge. So we got wet, and cold, but it was a really nice view. Then we walked all the way around the seawall to get to the totem poles in Stanley Park and holy crap my legs were about to snap off. I can say that I ate without guilt that day because I literally walked my ass off. Funny thing is that we then ate a really small lunch. We went to a place called SALT where they only serve salt cured meat and artisan cheeses. Hunk is a total cheese head, so we thought this would be fun. It was in a REALLY bad area - there were a lot of colorful things happening around us as we walked down the side alley that Salt was in. Blood Alley was aptly named, partially because it is a known rough area. We survived, but I am confident that there was more illegal activity that happened in that alley than I have seen in my lifetime. We got a plate with a combination of 2 cheeses, 1 meat and 3 condiments. I thought it was a bit pricey because it was really only an appetizer, but it was unique and the selections were really good so I'm not complaining. I'm also kinda frugal, so there's that.

Later that evening we readied ourselves for TequilaCon. I was excited to see Dave again, but I was stoked that was finally going to meet some people that I thought I would never get to meet due to our continental divide. It was funny that some people were really different than I thought they would be and then some were exactly as I imagined them, or even more awesome than I already knew they were. I can say that Jenny is now on a pedestal - she is one of the nicest, most genuine people I've ever met. I didn't know much about her from her blog posts since many of them have been photo booth essays, but I kinda figured she would be entertaining at the very least. I would've taken her home with me if I could because she is just good people. And Shari, whom I thought had dropped off the face of the earth after TC 2008 - she's alive and well and she is freakin' awesome. There were just so many nice people to meet, it was just fun and I'm so glad I was fortunate enough to be in the right place at the right time to be able to attend. Dave, Jenny, Dustin, Brandon and Vahid (who I might've drooled over a little bit) are all so cool to put this gathering together. There should be more people like them in the world. And they were all so extremely thoughtful, like SHARK EXTREME, just because I brought a few hats and I am forever honored to know them.

Some of the fabulous people I met......Angie & Brandon, Kerri Anne, Sarah, Sizzle & Mr. Darcy, Laura & Abby, Flo, Hillary, Angella.....there were more, but my photographic evidence wasn't very thorough and my memory was floating in tequila.


Sunday was my hike day, there were so many places I wanted to go, but I had to pick one so we chose Lynn Canyon for the suspension bridge, waterfalls and hiking trails. It was just gorgeous, I've wanted to be outside in the PNW for many, many moons and there was no way I was leaving this area without getting into the woods. It was so lush and the trees...the trees are just different than the south. I could spend all day just studying the evergreens and the moss - it was just perfect. My city boy loved the bridge and waterfall and I must admit I did pee myself a little on the suspension bridge. Holy crap those things are scary.

My trip home was less eventful, no customs problems. I also had NOTHING to watch!! I had started a few downloads in iTunes that didn't get to finish before I left home. On my trip up I watched all the completely downloaded movies and figured I'd hook up to wireless and finish the partial downloads for my trip home. Guess what!? You can't do that in Canada! There's also no hulu in Canada. Holy Crap!!!! I was really disappointed because man, that is a LONG way and the trip back had NO in-flight entertainment. FAIL!!

We got off the plane just in time to go straight to the softball field to my daughter's game, which I'm SO glad I didn't miss because she ROCKED the ballfield. I missed my kids, but I can't lie that I am happy to get away from them when these opportunities arise. I love them with all my heart, but I have to put just as much into my marriage because in the end, the kids will leave. I am proud that Hunk and I still have things that are "just ours" and that we can come home and slay the parenting deal just as well. So many of my friends put their children first and in the end, their marriages have suffered or failed. While we don't have a perfect marriage I have no doubt that we will be together forever, and while we have wonderful children and we give them as much of ourselves as we can, they do not define "us" and we will still be "us" after they are grown. This trip was a great opportunity to practice the balance of our commitments to each other and to our children and it was worth every penny spent, all the stressing travel drama, every shot of tequila and every stolen moment. And THAT is why I traveled across the country.

My hair was seriously cute when I left the hotel, screw you, rain!

Alive and Kicking

We had a successful thanksgiving dinner at my house last week, we had 13 people to feed and I hardly had enough leftovers to send a plate over to my grandmother's house (she hates people and won't come over).

Prior to everyone coming over we did the usual scrubbing of the house. I don't really know why, but I feel like we have to do this crazy cleaning ritual before having a party. Are people really going to look in the closets? After the house was sparkling I decided to work on the outdoor entry area. I had the typical fall decorations up, but it had been awhile since I had refreshed the flower bed mulch. It was looking faded and thin. I typically pay someone to deliver truckloads of cypress mulch, or pecan shells (yes, they work great!) to spread around our many beds. This gets pretty pricey since it really should be refreshed twice a year. I've gone a full year before adding to them, but they look really ragged if I wait.

I was walking around the property admiring the trees, etc. and just taking note that we have eleventy four bazillion pine trees around, which are constantly dropping pine needles on every surface around. In fact, I had spent Monday of last week blowing off the yard and driveway only to find on Thanksgiving Thursday that everything was completely recovered as if I had not lifted a finger! Anyway, on Monday I figured if I was blowing and piling all this pinestraw I should try to put it to use. In a matter of minutes I had filled the entire back of our truck with clean pinestraw. It took 2-3 truckloads to fill all our beds, but this was EASY. The pinestraw was mostly clean (a few leaves to pick out) and it was in abundance all along our driveway. I basically just drove up and down the driveway and piled it into the truck. We have a REALLY long drive so I was able to get enough pinestraw to cover ALL of our beds and it took me a grand total of about an hour to gather it all. It was much easier to spread than mulch because pinestraw weighs practically nothing.

So, for the past 1o years I've spent countless amounts of money on mulch, plus delivery when I could have just spent a few hours time and gotten it all done for free!

Unrelated, but pertaining to pinestraw.....we got two hermit crabs in November of 2008, FINALLY they both kicked the bucket last week. One of them was clearly dead and halfway out of his shell, the other was tucked really far down inside and was unresponsive. My daughter took them outside and buried them under pinestraw, not in a hole. This was because she wanted to go back and see what happened after a few days. I sent her out to take a look and Mr. Crab #2 was GONE!! Apparently, he was not dead after all and had been prancing around our yard for 4 days. She found him not far from the 'grave' and he was alive and kicking. He has since been returned to the cage (and warmth). I am amazed that he did not freeze to death out there. But it also gives a new appreciation to the reason that folks used to hold 'wakes', in case someone thought to be dead were to wake up! It happens!!!

A new addition

We have a new addition to our family. Oh God NO, I am not pregnant - people I am old and my eggs are shriveled, if I had a baby it would look like Benjamin Button!

Anyhoo, we have a new cat, sort of. We've had her since August 16 I just haven't talked about her. With good reason.

One week prior to getting "new cat" was the day that my cat "Ashley" disappeared. I was devastated, and so was my other cat "Emmie". Some friends of ours thought that it would ease our pain to give us this kitten(ish) that they found while camping the weekend of the 16th. So, they brought her home, and with all of the best intentions, gave her to us. We found her to be about 8 months old, full of ear mites and very hungry and scared. I agreed to keep her and thought it might be a good distraction for "Emmie" to have a little cat to boss around. "New Cat" looks A LOT like "Emmie" and so my kids, who are extremely creative and thoughtful, named her "Emma". Yeaahhh, that took a ton of brain power........

Now that "Emmie" is gone as well (and we do have a theory on that one)....."Emma" is our cat, sort of. She lives here, but she doesn't really like us. I'm trying really hard to like her, but I feel guilty that she is here - I'd rather have Ashley and Emmie back. I never wanted to replace them, and this is what it feels like. I think that if they are looking down on us, they see that they were replaced swiftly and thoughtlessly. This is the farthest from the truth.

"Emma" needed a home, and I am happy to give her one. We still have a long way to go in building a relationship though. She is not cuddly in the least, will never be held and if you sit near her, she gets up and moves away. In short, she is a snob. She has come out of her shell in the playful department, she really enjoys biting and attacking us - along with anything else that dares to move which is to be expected with such a young cat. It's a transition for me, and for her. I'm hoping it works out for the best, she can be really cute, but it passes very quickly.

As far as the fate of "Emmie", my mom reported that we have a coyote hanging around. This leaves me with all sorts of grisly thoughts about my poor kitty, but I can hope that it was fast and painless if that was his match. It's hard to gain closure when you never really know. My hearts goes out to anyone with a missing child, I can not even fathom the daily struggle and torture of the wondering.