It's not FAIR!

I'm usually pretty easy going, I don't get too rattled about stuff - except within my own house, and then crap will fly if you leave a wet towel on the floor, or look at me sideways. Anyway, in the big world I don't typically sweat the small stuff, and many of my friends would say that I am pretty laid back. I don't lose my head if things go awry at school, work, sports, etc. I'm typically fine to be along for the ride and if you screw something up, I'm trying to downplay it so that you don't feel so bad.

But some things, just make me mad. And they are so stupid, and so petty and I feel like such a moron for it. Mostly these things are when people who are super shitty seemingly spend their lives walking on beds of roses. Now, I know that everyone has their demons, their problems and their hidden woes - nothing is all how it seems on the outside. I guess what I'm getting at is that I don't like to see these people succeed, in anything. Yeah, like I said, PETTY. I'm being it.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not walking around wishing the plague on anyone. I don't hope they contract horrible diseases, or die a fiery death. But I just can't be happy for certain people when things go their way. When I hear good news, or stories of success, about someone that I know is a total douche it just pisses me off. I hate this about myself, because I don't want to walk around loathing certain people, but if you are a bottom feeder, I prefer to see you staying at the bottom.

Of course, the universe doesn't exist so that all the happy, fun people can get ahead. I don't know WHY the universe exists, but that's not it. The universe is perfectly happy to see the backstabbers and the manipulators get ahead. What I have to realize is the DEFINITION of "ahead". Maybe, what I see as their success is covering a much deeper problem (I can HOPE!). Maybe, I need to quit thinking that "ahead" means this, this and this.....

I just feel like a loser, because someone I know is reporting all kinds of happiness, bunnies and unicorns in her life. And in my heart, I know that she is a total wanker, and I don't like her. And to hear of her success, just pisses me off. I'm stamping my foot and screaming in my head that it just isn't FAIR!

Think me shallow, much?

Round Two

I posted a month ago about my cat Ashley and how she disappeared. It seems that the loss was too much for my other cat, Emmie to take. He sat on the front porch and waited and watched for just over a month and now he is gone. I think he was heartbroken. I know I was, now I'm double.

This cat took more shit from my kids, and kept on purring. While Ashley made it clear that we belonged to her, Emmie was the total opposite. He BELONGED to us, he loved us so unconditionally and so fully. Emmie did not know how to be a snob, he was the best cat I've ever had, in my life and I've had A LOT of cats. He will be a tough act to follow.

RIP Emmie, I'll miss you.

Trapped

While on my trip last week, I got trapped in the bathroom of my hotel room. I thought I'd share a bit more of the details.

We stayed at a Hilton in San Francisco, just a standard businessy hotel, with an executive level room. We had a fabulous view of the Bay and the room was just as we usually expect from a Hilton. The one thing that I hated was the bathroom door. I hated it from day one. Instead of a standard swinging door, it was a wooden door on a sliding track. I can see how this creates tons of floor space and it seems much less cramped than a door that opens up either into the small bathroom, or out into the entry way of the room. I get it. But this was not a pocket door, it was an attempt to be "like" a built in pocket door. The problem was that since this was added to a door that used to be a standard swinging door, the track rested on the outside of the wall. A typical pocket door disappears into the wall - also, when it is closed there are no gaps.

The door at the Hilton had gaps. BIG gaps. The door would slide in front of the bathroom opening, however it was not flush against the wall (if it was, it would not slide easily). Granted they designed the sliding door to be wider than the opening to the bathroom, but still, it did not lay against the wall, so if you are standing near the door you can pretty much see in the bathroom. Catch the gap at an angle and you can look right into the shower.

Nakedness is no secret between married folk, but there are some things are just better left 'unHEARD'. And believe me, if there is a gap there is NOT a sound barrier. This bathroom offered very little privacy and I was constantly wondering if Hunk was playing peeping tom through the gaps. Though I am a delicate flower, sometimes flowers have to poop, or toot, or a combination of both. This lovely door left a gap that allowed all sights, sounds and smells their freedom to run amuck. I HATED this bathroom door.

Apparently, it hated me, too. I was in the room alone in the afternoon and decided to shower. Was expecting Hunk to be back in two hours to go to an event. So, I bolted the hotel room door with the swinging bolty thing. I went into the bathroom and slid the door closed. I heard it click because I slid it a bit too far and left a crack, who cares, I'm alone. After my shower, I tried to slide the door open and it would not budge. I had wet hair and was in a towel trying to move a solid wood door that was HEAVY. It had fallen out of the track. It fell when I slid it too far, and only the part that slid out fell - meaning it was at an angle and it was jammed into the carpet. I tried and tried and could not move the thing. It is definately an odd thing to be flexing and lifting and groaning - while naked. At least if you are trying to move a door.

I eventually tried getting some leverage at the bottom of the door by using a hairbrush. It helped a bit, but then broke under the weight/pressure of the door. I managed to push the bottom of the door outward so that I could at least reach the bolt on the room door and unlock it to let management in to help me. I was twittering and getting advice on what to do. I figured it was pointless (in the beginning) to call the hotel because the room door had the slider bolt on - they could not get in the room. And, hello, I was also in a towel. Once I got an opening large enough to reach the slider I called for help. Before help arrived, I was able to continue to push the bottom of the door until I created an opening large enough for me to climb out.

I ended up breaking the header thing across the top of the door by pushing it out. When the hotel staff finally arrived, the guy was all confused as to what I had exactly done to the door. He had to rehang it and get the header repaired. I tried to explain that I had been trapped in the bathroom, but honestly, he didn't care. Just fix it and move on.

I took a photo of the door after I got out. It was the weirdest experience I've had in a while. I was in no danger, but just the dilemma of calling for help while naked, or waiting it out a couple hours and hoping that Hunk could save me. Luckily, I used my skills to get out on my own and thankfully I had my phone with me so I could call for help if needed. And no, I don't normally take my phone with me to the bathroom, but I was hoping to get a call from my daughter and I didn't want to miss it. It's hard to connect when your kids are on the opposite coast and have busy schedules!

Define Homeless

Yesterday, MSN had an article about a young blogger. The title was something like, Homeless Blogger lands great job at Elle Magazine. Intrigued, I clicked through and read the story.

Apparently this young woman, while homeless, wrote a letter to the editor of Elle about her search for a job and pulled some heartstrings. She mentioned her blog about being homeless and Elle took notice. The magazine ended up giving her a small job, and then in the end it has turned into a paid blogging gig. They are branding her as "the new face of the homeless" - meaning that homeless people aren't all dirty and uneducated, they can be tecnologically ept and have electronics to boot. I can agree with this, to an extent.

The thing about this girl is that I don't think that she was technically "homeless". She was living in an RV in a Walmart parking lot. She spent her days in Starbucks using free wifi and refills while she was job hunting and blogging. Correct me if I'm wrong, but an RV has a roof, walls, floor and BED, not to mention a bathroom/sink/shower.

I would not want to be in this girl's situation, however, walking down the streets of almost any major metropolis area can give you a completely different definition to the word homeless. There are people who have nothing, no where to go, no where to sleep and nothing to eat. Generally, I don't pity the homeless, I see many shelters and agencies that are willing to help them get back on their feet. Many of them just have no desire to do more with themselves. It is a choice that some of them have made to stay homeless - whether it be depression, drugs, alcohol, whatever. But the fact of the matter is, the girl in the article was FAR from homeless. Not only did she have an RV, she had an option to live with her mother, which she choose not to do. She had SOMEWHERE to live, she just didn't want to live there. She took to living in her RV at a free parking spot at Walmart by choice. But, still, the RV was her home. She had somewhere dry and secure to go every night. People on the street don't have that luxury - if the shelters are full, they are out of luck. The people on the street literally have only what is on their backs. They can't claim any property or structure as their own. To me, that is a much better definition of homeless.

So, this girl didn't have a job and (probably) got pissed at her mom, she choose to live on her own in a free RV in a free parking space and blog off the kindness of Starbucks wifi on a computer that she owned. But OH MY, let's all see this as a heart warming story of the saving of the homeless!!

While I hate to see so many people in bad financial situations due to job loss or economic strain, this just doesn't strike me as a great story. She got lucky by being the first person to use this spin on her situation, but to many people who are truly homeless, the girl had it made. I feel for her being in the situation she was in, but just because you don't live in a brick and mortar structure does not automatically drop you into the homeless category in my book. Kudos to her for landing a job, but call it what it is - and it isn't homeless.

Japantown