I can't write what I feel today. I just don't have the words and I'm just not a writer. I wish I could spill it all out and that it would all makes sense, but I type and erase and realize that I just don't have it in me. Nothing comes out how it feels and words just can't describe it.
I call him "Babe" and he calls me "Babe". I don't know why, it just works. My grandfather has always been one of my friends. Today, my friend has a rare cancer and I have no words for it. The only word I have is hope, I hope that there is more time. He has had a long and plentiful life, but I'm just not finished with him yet.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Babe
at 8:28 PM |
Labels: Babe, cancer, grandfather, no words
Monday, July 28, 2008
Skeptic
Have you ever had a friend that you really wanted to tell her something, but just knew that you couldn't?
I do.
I have a long time, great friend and I love her dearly. I can not stand her man and I can not tell her. This is killing me. They have been together for a few years and try as I might, I can't stand the guy. This doesn't keep us apart, but it makes it hard to want to do all the fun things like go out, go away or just stay in. But I can not tell her. See, there is nothing about this guy that makes me believe that he is mistreating her or cheating on her, etc. It is not that I get an immoral vibe, but that I just really think he is completely full of shit. I can not remember having one, not even one, conversation with this person where I felt like he was being honest and genuine. Not EVER.
When I talk to my friend we always talk about our guys and what they are up to, etc. and the things that she tells me that are going on in their lives are so unbelievably off the wall, I can't believe that she buys his crap. He is a first rate egomaniac and thinks that he is God's gift to the world - and he loves to talk about how much everyone just loves him and how he is the absolute best at, well, EVERYTHING. It is just really too much. The stories he tells are so incredibly outlandish that I can't see how anyone buys it. Perhaps my friend wants to focus on the positive and give him the benefit of the doubt, but I am amazed that she is blind to the steaming manure. If I were to believe even 1/4 of his stories, this man has been offered countless jobs with salaries higher than anyone I know, yet there is always a reason that the job is just not for him.
I suppose I am just a skeptic. I get it honest, though. My grandmother on the not so inbred side of my family doesn't trust anyone.ever.noway. She honestly thinks that everyone on earth is out to rip her off. This is a great trait to have since so many elderly people are preyed on, but she is downright nasty to folks. She doesn't trust the bank and I'd venture to say that if her house burned down so would all her money. She handed this skepticism down to my father and he has always told us to "do the research" on everything. He is pretty leary to most salespeople and 'new' fangled ideas. I get my loathing of salespeople from him. While I have finally met some salespeople on the up, I still have my doubts about a lot of them. I do think I read people pretty well, and if I get a weird vibe from someone at first meeting it is really hard for me to ever get past it.
So, back to my point, I got a weird vibe the first time I met my friend's man. I've questioned her on a lot of things, but never have come right out to say I just don't like him. They are married and it won't change anything if I do say it, other than to harm our friendship. So I suppose I should just deal with it.
at 7:18 PM |
Labels: friends, skepticism, trust
Friday, July 25, 2008
Inbred
I've known my whole life that my grandparents were cousins.
Yes, I said it outloud(?), my grandparents were related to one another before getting married. (insert GASP). Now everyone can proceed to determine that YES I live Georgia, the south, the capitol of backwards southerness and inbreeding. If you are a stero-typing butthead, yes, that is true. Fortunately for me, I never truly knew the entire background of this related-ness until now. NOW, I know that I am actually more inbred that I ever thought. My grandparents are 3rd cousins! Here's a little snippet of my family tree (names have been changed to protect the not so innocent).
at 9:10 AM |
Labels: Daughters of the American Revolution, family tree, health
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Headache
Not tonite, honey, I have a headache......
This has been more often than not lately. I get headaches fairly regularly. I can usually tell when I'm going to get one, but as much as I do to try to ward it off, it always comes. Recently, I've been getting more frequent headaches at times when I would not normally get one. These headaches are not as intense as the migraines, but annoying none the less. I really should probably get checked out.........
I sent my husband to bed in a huff because I had a headache and he was getting no love from me. I THOUGHT the testosterone was running smoothly since he spent a few hours blowing up people on the Playstation. Apparently I was wrong.
The next morning I wake up and reach to push my hair behind my ears. I feel something crusty in my hair, but I dismiss it to the fact that I have kids and somebody probably put their grimy hands in my hair while giving goodnight kisses. No problem, I'm taking a shower anyway. In the mirror I notice my face has white crust from the corner of my mouth to my ear and then again up on my forehead. Did I drool myself into a puddle? No, I don't really do that. Now I'm just MAD.
I walked into the bedroom, "so what, now I'm a TOOL to use while I'm sleeping? You are a freak show! Who does this to their sleeping wife!? Are you KIDDING ME???", I'm screaming to a very confused looking husband. I will tolerate a lot of weird stuff, but don't mess with me while I am asleep. Have the courtesty to wake me up and then use me for your own satisfaction..... My blood was boiling, "and YOU are washing the sheets you pervert!".
My husband gave me a moment to collect myself, I went and washed my face. I also realized that some of the crust on my face was greenish.....WTF? I know this is not like "snot green" and I start to recall the events of the night. Husband, blasting away on Playstation and me with a headache. My typical headache routine is to take multitudes of Excedrin and put ice on my head. My pervert husband had purchased me a gel eyemask to keep in the freezer for such headaches - they usually concentrate around my eye area. I used that eyemask for this particular headache. That eyemask that is filled with GREEN gel. That eyemask that is supposed to be refridgerated, not FROZEN. That eyemask that is LEAKING GREEN GEL which drys into a nice crust. Ok, so he's not a using me for a tool while I'm asleep, I guess I will stop calling him a pervert - for today.
at 10:32 AM |
Labels: eyemask, headache, hot husband, migraines, Playstation 3
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Davelanta 2
at 6:18 PM |
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Engaged!
First off - did you realize there was a category in the Emmy's for a REALITY SHOW HOST??!! That is just LAME! Really, an Emmy? Seriously, what have we come to......?
While on our Lake Michigan shoreline tour (yes, one day I will stop talking about Chicago and how I love thee....) we got an amazing view of the city. It is truly incredible. We also puttered out to check out the old lighthouse in the harbor. Just as we pulled up to the lighthouse a guy next to us falls to his knee and proposed to his girlfriend. Awwww, it was so cute and she said YES!! and the whole boat cheered. It was sweet.
My engagement was a little bit low key. I was working at a mega-mart during my college summer break and Kevin came to pick me up after work. There was this "feelings" chart at the store and as we walked past it he stopped. "Lovestruck" was his choice, which I thought was so sweet - I had no idea what I was in for that evening!! We then went to our favorite restaurant, parked and he asked me to get him a Kleenex out of his glove compartment. When I opened the glove box I immediately saw a ringbox and panicked. I pulled out a tissue and shut the glove box!! Ha ha ha!!! I was just in total shock that this was happening right here, right now. Kevin did not find this funny. He asked for another Kleenex and, after I had a moment to compose myself, I was all casual like "oh, what's this?". And I opened it and he asked me - right there in his car. Of course, I said YES and the rest is history. Kevin constantly laments that he didn't choose a location more romantic than his car, but I have no regrets or complaints. I'm a no frills kind of girl and I was ecstatic that he actually wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. All that stalking had finally paid off!!
The best part was that earlier in the day Kevin was at my parents' house, along with me. He asked my dad to help him check out something in his car for repair. I told him it was useless and could not be fixed, "Dad, really, it isn't even worth a look....", but Kevin INSISTED and I got really irritated. This was all his way to get my dad alone and to 'ask' him about the engagement. Funnier than that, my dad said, "well, she might not say yes...." ROTFL...... Way to go, Dad!! Shoot that boy right out of the lovestruck mood! I have no idea what my dad was thinking, why he said that, or why he actually thought that, but it's a good thing it did not stop Kevin. Otherwise, I might be a homeless lady with a pet rat.
Please share your story, or if you aren't married/committed do you already have it planned out? Are there guys who actually spend a few years thinking about it, or have engagement fantasies the way we girls spend most of our lives picturing our wedding?
at 8:49 AM |
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Cockroach!
This is what my Sugar & Spice & Everything Nice little 7 year old finds amusing. While at the Nature Center in Chicago we visited the gift shop and this is what nice little souvenir my cute little girl chose. These things are so frickin' disgusting and I have no mind control as I can't even touch the little abominations. Everytime I see one I jump out of my skin. And we have THREE of these.....they are popping up in every room of the house. And EVERYTIME I have a small heart attack. ICK. And they are just plastic. How pathetic am I?
It is pretty genius - a very real bug with a sticky wheel on the bottom. When you stick it to the wall it begins to scurry down. Blarrrrrghhhhhhh. Who needs boys??
at 11:22 AM |
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Responsibility
I looked so forward to going on vacation last week, I usually do. I generally will pack for vacation no less than a week in advance. Last year, we took the kids on a cruise and I packed for the cruise over a period of 6 months - I kid you not. I will set up an area in the house and when I see something that would be great for wherever we are going I put it in the box. Ok, so it isn't truly "packing", but I guess preparing. The point is that I REALLY look forward to vacations.
I'm back to reality now and, as usual, I'm having a hard time getting back into the groove of things. I don't want to cook or plan meals, I don't want to work, I don't want to exercise and I definately don't want to get up early. I'm lucky in the respect that I don't have a 'real' job where I have to get up (God Bless You, Kevin, for having a real job!!), but I have a ton of other responsibilities that I just don't want to face. I'm just so tired of having so many things to worry about and attend to that I have a paralysis of effort and can't do anything. A week is not enough of a break. I often wonder if I'd be happier if I just got a job where I was more of a minion instead of being the owner, worker, buyer, salesperson, CEO, CFO and janitor all at once. I doubt I'd be happy long, but I wonder.....
I'm not sure how long of a break would deem enough, probably no amount of time is truly enough. Perhaps I just need change. I'm the kind of person that can't stand a routine and I get stir crazy and need things to go differently or to have something new to do. Unfortunately for me, I keep adding new things to do or to be responsible for and I don't seem to retire anything else. Therefore, I am constantly overloaded with responsibilities. It also has to do with my need to be in control of everything around me - I am getting better with that, but still...
I'm in a post-vacation slump. Wouldn't it be nice if you could go on vacation and have someone attend to everything for you while you're away. What I would give to come home to no laundry, a week's worth of dinners, no bills or activities and definately not a pile of work and related messages & emails to return!! If only there were a Bathroom Monkey to do it all while I'm away!!
Side note - what kind of person does it take to enjoy exercise? Seriously, it must be genetic because no matter how hard I try to enjoy it I count the milli-seconds until it is over. And I can never motivate myself to push an extra few minutes/lbs/whatever. I absolutely hate every moment of it, no matter what kind of mood I'm in. It must be my intense aversion to routines and that I feel this is something that I have to do regularly. Is it just me?
at 8:49 AM |
Monday, July 14, 2008
Saturday, July 12, 2008
Home
We finally made it home from Chicago - and boy is it HOT in Atlanta! I'm ready to move! We walked out of the airport and it hit like a firey wall.....oh yes, we are home. My hair began to curl immediately - that's humidity for you.
And as you can see, Bad Monkey got around quite a bit while we were in Chicago.....though that doesn't surprise me one bit.
at 11:23 PM |
Labels: Blogger Meet, Chicago, iPhone
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Cat hair
Our refridgerator is on it's way out. It is 8 years old and has served us well, but I'm ready for a younger, hipper icebox. About two days ago, my Diet Coke just did not seem right. The ideal temperature for a Coca Cola product is 38 degrees. I know this for a fact because I went to the World of Coke. While Dave2 was bludgeoning most of the staff with his free Coke in a bottle because they did not have Coke with Lime, I was educating myself on the proper temperature at which to enjoy a Coke product. I digress. My Diet Coke has been noticeably warmer than 38 degrees. I shrugged it off - perhaps it wasn't in the fridge long enough to get proper. Then, the milk went bad. It didn't get gross, but I'm a compulsive milk smeller and the proper temperature for my milk is less than 38 degrees. I will only drink ICE COLD milk and I'm constantly checking it for freshness. I REFUSE to buy milk unless it is the very last item in the cart and that we are going straight home and it is the first item out of the car and into the icebox. Whew. Our milk was not right. HAPPY DANCE, I'm thinking I'm getting a new fridge - FINALLY!
Kevin totally burst my bubble. He made me call a repairman to check it out first. Why buy a new one if this one just needs an adjustment.....but, but, but. Sigh.
I decided to clean the fridge top to bottom, before having someone look at it. I'm weird like that. I could never have a housekeeper as I would clean before they came over. I cleaned the inside, outside and vacuumed the little vent that runs along the bottom of the front. The cat likes to sleep RIGHT IN FRONT of the fridge next to the warm air that comes from that vent. The vent therefore, needs to be vacuumed off pretty often as it gets cat hair on it. Ok repairman, I'm ready.
The guy looks it all over, feels around, asks some questions. He then lays down in front of the fridge (like my cat, except with buttcrack) and pops the vent cover off. HOLY SHIT! I never actually looked behind the vent. The entire bottom portion of my refridgerator was gray. That is, CAT HAIR GRAY. It was embarassingly cat hair gray. Every inch of every coil was completely covered in cat hair. OH HOW GROSS. "Uhhhhm, Ma'am, I think I found your problem....."
See, when refridgerator coils get suffocated by cat hair they cause over heating which causes your fridge to lose it's cool, so to speak. So, diagnosis is to please vacuum out all the cat hair and that will be $80 thankyouverymuch.
My Diet Coke is now at 38 degrees and I'm happy, but I'd be happier if no one had ever seen the horror of what was under my fridge - and if I had a brand new stainless steel Sub Zero. But the main focus now is to get a body guard for the cat. Kevin no longer refers to her as "Ashley" - he walks around screaming "Get your ass out of here 79.95!!".
at 8:23 AM |
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Coinage
We are leaving for Chicago soon! YEA!! I decided to bring the kids along due to an incredible airfare deal that I found on Delta. The girls are thrilled, but since they didn't have much notice that we were going on a trip they were unable to 'save up' some spending cash. The woes of going to American Girl with no money..... SO being my smart and wonderful self I told my girls that they could collect change around the house and use it for their spending money on the trip. I am now wishing I could eat those words. My lovely girls have managed to scrounge up quite a little kitty. We spent last night rolling nickles, dimes and quarters that they have found in closets, jars, bags, purses, drawers, cushions, desks, etc. We then took the pennies (too numerous to count) to the Coinstar machine. Apparently, not counting the pennies was a good choice......
at 1:40 PM |