Thursday, August 2, 2007

Creamy

No matter what anyone tells you, believe me...Laser Hair Removal HURTS.

The spa that I go to offers a numbing cream which is quite expensive. Not to say that it's not worth almost any amount of money to escape the pain, I was certain that I could get a less expensive numbing cream. So I read up on the matter, found an item to look for and headed off to the pharmacy. Well, none of the pharmacies that I went to knew what in the world I was talking about. I clearly explained that I was undergoing laser hair removal and blah, blah, blah, but no one knew of this cream that I so desired. There was only one pharmacist that offered another solution.

Now, this pharmacist was a younger type of man, not the typical gray beard. I'd say he was in his 30's and very Enrique Suave looking. He listened to my dilemma and said, at first, that he had nothing. So I started to stroll the aisles and see if I could find anything that might work. Then a little female pharmacy worker came up to me and pulled me aside and began to whisper, "the pharmacist has thought of something that may help, it is in the family planning area", which at family planning she could barely get the words out. I was amused by the secrecy of the whole matter and I wanted to scream out - "OH, YOU MEAN PENIS CREAM!!??", but I did not.

It was just hilarious to me that in a medical related type of field these people were embarrassed to talk about 'family planning products'. Especially the pharmacist himself. I mean, he actually had to send a female over to me to suggest a great idea. Maybe he is all too familiar with the product, who knows. So I was off to the 'family planning area' to look at penis cream. There were several types of creams to numb the area, which as you boys know makes things last longer. While I was there for a different reason, it was quite intriging. For the most part, PENIS CREAM has about 8% numbing agent. So I continued to look around and I found a product for the relief of pain from BOILS. What is a boil? I don't know, but they must be quite painful as the BOIL CREAM has 20% of the same numbing agent as PENIS CREAM. Giggling I took a tube of both BOIL CREAM and PENIS CREAM up to the pharmacist and proceeded to ask questions about if the two might work the same way, only the BOIL CREAM should work much better. He did his best to help me, but clearly wanted to crawl under the counter. Grow up boys!!

With my BOIL CREAM in hand I was off. It worked quite well I might add. I have another treatment today and I've just covered myself in BOIL CREAM. It is thick and gooey and smells horrible, but I can't feel the friggin' laser beams so I love it. And I'm happy that I don't have to tell you that I just rubbed PENIS CREAM all over my legs. My fingers, though, are beginning to get a little num,fb, thwe stufgf is harwd to wawsh off...